Lips Just Like Paula

I swore to avoid watching American Idol this year.  Not only has this show gone on much too long, but without Simon Cowell, I see no point.  Aside from enjoying the ridiculous audition attempts from singers only a mother could love, Simon was the only redeeming factor of this show.  I loved his sarcastic barbs and scant praise.  I think Kara Whatshername was smart to abandon this show.  Now we have good-ole’ Randy Dawg, J Lo, and Steven Tyler (a/k/a “Lips”), which I am convinced is really Paula in man-drag. 

I was able to avoid the very tempting auditions this year and was only drawn in when I heard a friend mention an actual musician-type, Casey Somebodyorother.  This type of singer was the reason that I started watching Idol 27 seasons ago – to see those worthy yet undiscovered talents.  If you haven’t heard, America chose to vote for Casey less than the others (as America often does to actual talent) and he was ‘saved’ by the judges last night.  I actually caught 15 minutes of that episode and noticed that Paula isn’t gone – she has simply morphed into an old rocker.  Not only is Steven as worthless a judge as Paula was, he has the same doped/comatose face at the table and inconsequential remarks like “Slap that baby on the ass and call me christmas” (huh?).  Like Paula, Steven Tyler and his iconic lips have been donned in some sort of animal print each time he has sat at the judges’ table.  Also like Paula, his hair is some coifed version of 80’s Bon Jovi.  I’m sure I’m not the first to say this but, dude looks like a lady!  A lady who is bored and tired.  Well he is 75 after all.

(notice the animal print)

Anyway, bravo to the “judges” for keeping Casey for another week.  Sadly, America will probably make the wrong choice again next week and axe him and some other poor schlep.  And then we will only have Paula-Steven’s lips, vacant stare and bizarre lines to entertain.  I wonder what he will wear and say next (so basically, it’s just another season of AI).